Update! Finally....

So tonight I went to Facebook. I rarely go to facebook. When I do, I end up spending hours reading my friends posts. Remembering good times I've had with them and wondering where the time goes. I also enjoy knowing what is going on with my friends and lift them in my prayers. Then I realized I have not blogged in a llllooooonnnnnggggg time either. So here is an update and my apology
Overall, we are doing well. We are so blessed. I am grateful!

David Alexander is in 2nd grade - his report card on Wednesday was straight A's. David's teacher told me she has to fuss at him to stop reading! lol - there is always a time and place for everything! He loves drawing and explaining things. He love all things electronic. Video games! He is so funny! His handwriting is terrible, I have started a series of test with a vision specialist. Hopefully, we can get this figured out and give him what he needs to be even more successful.

William is in Kindergarten. He is also doing very well. Reading, spelling, and cartwheels. He is so strong! A couple weeks into school he told me, "Mom, did you know there is a rule at school no cartwheels inside. I had to walk the dots (timeout) again at recess for doing cartwheels!" What amazes me is the number he can do in a row and how long he can continuously do cartwheels. He is either fun, easy going, sweet, a super help, and warm OR a professional button pusher with a temper to match his moms! Poor kid - victim of genetics!

"David the dad" has made some changes at work but they seem to have had very positive results. He is still extremely busy and has stress --but things are going very well for him.

Me - well, I am trying to keep things in perspective. Trying to put myself first, caring for my family second, and then helping others. That is not a simple task for me at all. I know that it is important. I also trying to figure out who I am and what is my purpose. I suppose that is ongoing through out any ones life. I just celebrated my 2nd year anniversary for being a breast cancer survivor. Tonight, as I have read posts and blogs my friend Abigail has posed some of the same questions that I too have been pondering. So I am not alone. My friend April expressed beautifully the joy and anger of being a cancer survivor. Happy to have gotten to this point in the path but so dam mad for the cancer pit stop. In treatment I was positive, strong, and joyful. So it seems ridiculous that past treatment and being cancer free that I have bouts of extreme sadness and anger. Terrified of recurrence, yet not trying to waste time worrying about getting cancer again. Wondering what is my purpose. The conclusion I have come to is God has great plans for me- I have survived so much in my 38 years. I have also enjoyed and loved so much in 38 years! So life is good and also so complicated.

As far as medical treatment, next week I will get nipples. Yes, when you have a bilateral mastectomy they take even the nipples. So a mushroom shape cut, a little twist, some stitches and I'll be closer to looking like all the other boobs out there. Then in December I'll get the color of my nipples tattooed on. I go to my oncologist every four months until my 5 year anniversary. Then I will go every six months.... I am so grateful that I really like my oncologist! I take my cancer inhibitor every day. As well as calcium three times daily for my osteoporosis and osteopenia. I take something for my joints. But other than that I am healthy. My mind is getting clearer and clearer. I know that if I exercise regularly, eat well and get enough sleep I do real well. If not, then I get overwhelmed, emotional, stressed out so easily - to the point where I am frozen. That is not me at all. But if I take care of myself it does not happen. So I continue to put one foot in front of the other, answer one question at a time and carry on.

I pray all is well with you and your family. Talk to you soon!
Laura

May 2009

Updates- Well, I think I should update my blog at least once a month. Sounds reasonable... I'll see what I can do.

I just celebrated 1 1/2 years cancer free - hard to believe. I know it! Remember I did chemo Jan - March 08 after I was cancer free with my mastectomy in Nov 07. Now I go for follow up appointments every three months with my oncologist. I went last week and all things are looking good and I am healing well. My Rheumatologist has released me since I started training I am not having the aches and pains. I am proud to say that my hard work with my trainer has really paid off. I have lost 8 pounds and 1 inch off my waist, 1 inch off my hips, 1/2 off my thighs and 1/4 inch off my upper arms. More importantly my fat mass % has gone down and my lean muscle mass % has gone up. My goal is to be healthy, to take the best care of my self possible.

My bone scan in March showed that my bone density is greatly decreasing - this is due to my surgical menopause in June 08 and chemo in the first quarter of 08. SO I am taking Fosamax one time weekly and given up DR Pepper. I know - you are thinking Laura you were the poster child for Dr. Pepper. You drank it 24/7. Well, the phosphates in dark sodas leach the calcium from your bones. I am 37 years old and plan on living to 87 or more, and I love these bones. I don't know what I would do with out them. It was not easy - it took about 6 weeks to quit craving them. I don't know if I could drink one now if I had to.

School is coming to an end. William 3 days for his preschool. David three weeks. It is a run, run, run time of year. We are all doing well. It is hard to believe that both my guys will be in school full time next year. They will do great. They love learning.

I am praying about what I am to do next year. Where is God leading me? What does He want me to do? What is my purpose in life? I love the job I have now - wife, mom, daughter... so many opportunities.

William's preschool is closing due to some changes of focus in their churches ministries. I am looking into and prayerful considering opening a MDO program. The church we are currently going to is purchasing land this month and moving towards building in the next two or so years. So I am looking into the logistics, facilities, partnerships - opportunities in the area. There is so much to consider. My goals are serving the children of our community and perhaps giving time/space to Wonders and Worries and Breast Cancer Resource Center. I love those two organizations. They have been such great help throughout my walk.


How do I fulfill God's will and use my gifts He has given me?
I'll let you know when I find the path. We are looking forward to a summer full of swimming, friends, family - and of course LEARNING!

In my Guide Posts Daily Inspirational Book - one of the reading was discussing a personal mission statement. The one the author found in Genesis stuck with me and I'd like to share it with you. "And you will be a blessing" So in all that I do may I be a blessing, may I serve God and others by following His will. It is so simple and yet so profound too.

It is getting late and I hope that I have not rambled on and made no sense at all. I just keep putting up date blog on my list of to do items and not doing it. So here it is almost midnight but I feel better now that you know I am doing great and appreciate that you cared to look.

Love and prayers to you all,
Thank you for your friendship, support, and love,
Laura

Hello World - I'm posting a new post!

Today's date is March 4, 2009 - and it seems that I have not posted in a very long time. So sorry for all those people who religiously check my blog.

Overall, I am doing very well. I am still cancer free - since my mastectomy in November 2007! Yippee and Yahoo! I go and see my oncologist every three months. Things are looking good. I have not gotten the details on my breast - nipples and tattoos. I am very pleased with the size but not the shape. I am looking into what can be done about that.

In November I went and saw my PCP about hand and joint pain I was having. It was waking me up at night! He thought it was probably carpal tunnel and gave me some great wrist bands to help but also did some blood work. This showed that my inflammation levels were elevated. I went back in two weeks for more blood work and it showed that my inflammation levels were even higher, so he sent me to a rheumatologsit. She interviewed me, examined me physically, and did blood work. She believed that it was stress and trauma to my body from the past year, being overweight, and lack of movement. I will see her again this month for a three month follow up.

I joined 24 hour fitness and have been working with a trainer to build core strength. I learned that I walk incorrectly, have bad posture, and breath wrong. Well, not for long.... It has been really hard but I am really motivated. I will do it!

I had a follow up bone scan yesterday- it showed that my osteoponia in T4,T5, T6 and left hip is at 1.7 - at 1.5 is when it becomes osteoporosis. So I now take a medication to rebuild my bone density. Remember - I am only 37! Oh well, at least they found it and we are treating it!

We were talking tonight and I said I was angry to have had breast cancer, osteoponia, and now my bones were losing mass. William said that he was angry that his school was only two days a week and not five. If David Alexander had been in the room he would have said that he was angry because he had to go to school. He would rather stay home and chill out. So there has been lots of healing in our house for William to want school five days a week. Soon enough my friend, soon enough.

I am grateful for modern day medicine and all that they know! It is overwhelming to think if I had to do this on my own- so to speak. Thank God for all things are possible through Him.

Thnak you for all my wonderful friends and family who call, email and check on me. I love you too!
Love and prayers,
Laura

Komen Walk for the Cure

Sunday, I walked the Komen Walk for cure. It was awesome! Very inspirational and also emotional too. My Mom, Dad, and dear friend Murray went and walked with me. I saw several friends from Breast Cancer Resource Center and the Pink Ribbon Cowgirls. I also saw Rachel, my infusion nurse at Texas Oncology. It was a good day. Dad stayed home with the boys - this was our first time and we did not know what to expect. We will all be there next year. It was great. Thank you for all your support and donations.

Love and prayers,
Laura

One Year Anniversary and Follow Up Appontments

I have reached my one year anniversary for my diagnosis with breast cancer. Although, I would never wish that "anniversary" on anyone, I am very happy be here to celebrate. In the last year I have been diagnosed with breast cancer, had a mastectomy, 4 cycles of chemotherapy, a hysterectomy, another mastectomy and reconstruction. Not an easy year! I am very blessed to have such a loving and supportive husband, family, and support system. We are also blessed by insurance and the many resources available in the Austin area; Wonders and Worries, Cleaning for a Reason, Breast Cancer Resource Center to name a few.

I would like to say I am a better person because of this "walk". Most days anyway... There has been good that has come from it - I advocate for awareness, my boys can deal with stress in healthy ways, they can talk, talk, talk, about anything on their minds, we are strong and united as a family, I have met some wonderful and loving people in support groups and through support services. I am truly thankful.

Monday, I went to my three month check up with my plastic surgeon. On November 17 I am scheduled for my nipple construction. It is an office visit. He will cut a mushroom shape flap, twist it and stitch it. In six weeks, I'll get them tattooed to have the correct color and I'll be as good as new! I am healing well and he is very pleased with my progress.

Monday, I also had a follow up with my oncologist. Everything looks great and I'll see her again in three months.

My Primary Care Physician did some blood work to check for arthritis. I have severe hand, hip, knee and shoulder pain and stiffness. The worst being my hands. He was sure it was carpal tunnel but the blood work should I had elevated levels for arthritis. 20 is normal, my first test was 35, two weeks later was 42. I am being referred to a rheumatologist.

I am 37. I am a breast cancer survivor, I have osteopenia, and arthritis BUT I and HAPPY and BLESSED to be here. I am also a wife, a mother of two sweet boys, a daughter, a sister, an aunt, a cousin, a friend and a teacher. Thank you for your support, love, friendship, cards, emails, donations of any kind. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Love and prayers
Laura

P.S. David and William are doing great in 1st grade and preschool. They are so fun to be with. David has lost his fourth tooth this week. William dropped off a present and card to his "best friend" at preschool today. Life is good!

William is healing....

Much progress has been made in William's healing with the stress of my journey. David was sheltered from a lot because he was in school.

William on the other hand was part of it all. He started a school two days a week- which he refused to go to after my second chemo. He went to most Dr appointments with me because he refused to stay with anyone but his father and my mom. William was also with me after chemo on those days of exhaustion and weakness. He basically refused to leave my side.

William has stopped coming to bed with me at night. He loves to snuggle when he wakes up in the morning but does not insist on sleeping with me.

William also refused hair cuts after chemo caused my hair to fall out. The day I returned home from my reconstructive surgery he asked for a hair cut.
Although I did love his great long hair, his hair cut is very nice too. Certainly easier to wash and comb.

Today was the first day of preschool. He went for the 1 1/2 hour Open House. He screamed, cried and fought me for at least an hour before hand. I carried him in screaming and crying. After sitting and playing with him, reading to him for quite a while I was able to move away, fill out paper work and eventually join the other parents at the meeting. When I returned to the classroom he came over and whispered to me that he changed his mind and did want to come to school here. today was the first day for everyone in the "Frog" classroom, even if they went there last year. Today they built community. Today the became a class, a community- friends. Words can not express my relief and happiness.

My arguments with William were that was what four year olds did. David went to Mrs. Kelli's preschool. So he wanted to go there too - but we can not because it is near the old house. I think that clincher for him was that I told him that I did not want the fact that I was diagnosed with breast cancer last year to keep him from living life like other four year olds. I had also decided that I would fight him until he gave up. I am so glad that I did! I am also very relieved he saw I was serious and tried it.

Our family is finding a new kind of normal. It has not been a year yet - we are so blessed to be here so quickly. We are far from perfect but doing well. All things considered we are doing great!

Thank you for your continued support and love.
Laura

Post Op Appointment # 3

Friday August 29th , I had another check up. Everything looks great! All restrictions have been lifted except for swimming. I still have some healing to do, do germy bodies of water. I have purchased some bras. I am starting feel and definately look "normal" again. I am so blessed to be here on this side of my journey healing nicely. Thank you so much for your friendship, love and support.

love and prayers,
Laura

Post Op Check Up #2

Friday August 15th I went in for an appointment with my surgeon. I had gotten myself stressed that my breast were not healing right, so they worked me in for an appointment. Having never done this before sometimes you just need someone to say "Hey, things are going great. No worries." So that is what I got. He is very pleased with my healing and progress. I still have the same physical limitations set by the Dr, but feel better and stronger every day.

Thank you for all your help, support and continued prayers.
Laura

Post Op Check Up # 1

I had my post op appointment today. The physician's assistant said that everything looked wonderful and was healing well. She removed my three drains. I can drive, walk or ride a stationary bike but to be mindful that my body is working hard to recover. I can continue on no lifting and nothing strenuous.

I feel great! I get tired easier than normal and am stretching out my tummy. All things considered I feel very blessed. Thank you for your continued love and support and prayers.

love and prayers,
Laura

Post Surgery Update # 2

Hello All

Today is Thursday July 31st. I was discharged from the hospital on Monday the 28th.I do have to say that I am not very good at asking for help and not helping out- you know just sitting still. This last year has been a great lesson in asking for help and sitting for me.

David, David Alexander, and William have been staying with David's parents since the 23rd. I came home from the hospital to Memaw and Popo's too. They have been wonderful! We are so blessed. The boys have had so much fun with their grandparents and cousins down the street.

We are going home on Saturday. My sister is coming to help out at the house. We need to get back to our beds and routine. It will be fun to have the sisters and the cousins back together again.

The surgery was very hard. I was surprised. Sounds crazy- but that I would be surprised. All of my other surgeries have been at the longest 2 hours and it took a day or two to feel close to 100%. I knew it would take longer amount of time to heal but I didn't realize how much more intense the pain would be. Today has been one week(at 11pm). Each day is better. I feel little stronger . The pain is less and less, too. All things considered I don't think that I could be doing any better. Every new day is a blessing, a gift, and I do cherish them.

Thank you for you continued prayers, kind words, and well wishes. They are greatly appreciated. I am so grateful to have so many wonderful and loving people caring about me.

love and prayers
Laura

Post-surgery Update #1

Laura has been sleeping a little more during the last 24 hours and despite some pretty intense pain, she is doing very well. She got positive reports from her entire medical team this morning. She'll probably be in the ICU a few more days. She still can't take phone calls, but she is checking her email. Keep those encouraging notes coming.

Laura is Recovering

Laura successfully underwent 15 hours in the operating room yesterday. We arrived at the hospital at 6am and they wheeled her into surgery at 8:00am. We finally talked to the plastic surgeon at 11pm. Laura awoke from the anesthesia at around midnight. Her voice was weak, but she said she was feeling good and in little pain. She is in the ICU right now. Visiting hours are limited to 10a-2p, 4p-6p and 8p-10p. Cell phones are not allowed in the unit and other restrictions do apply. Keep up the prayers and well wishes and I'll send a more detailed report this afternoon.

Upcoming Surgery

I will be at Seton Main for my DIEP flap reconstruction. I will be there for several days. Please feel free to call me on my cell phone. The boys are happily with Memaw and Popo. Sugar is at the dog hotel. All things are going well. Thank you for your continued support and prayers

July 24th, 2008

Thursday, July 24th, 2008 I am having my reconstruction. I am excited to have two breasts again. I am overwhelmed by the packing and planning - trying to care for and prepare for the unknown. But I really am very excited. In my mind this will bring so much closure to my journey with breast cancer. Thank you all for your continued love, support, and prayers. I am so happy and blessed to be here to receive them.

We have renamed the dog Sugar. Snow rhymed with 'no' and it seemed to be confusing to her! Hopefully, this one will stick!

Laura

What's New?

We got a dog today. She is a two year old American Eskimo. Her name is Snowball. We got her from the shelter, she had been turned in by owner as unwanted. She is very mellow. The boys are very excited. It has been almost three years since we had a dog. We were ready.

My reconstruction is on the 24th of this month! Yippppeeee! I am having the DIEP Flap procedure. Here are some links; one is from the surgeon I am using(Dr. Snyder), the other I found very helpful.

www.breastflap.com/diep_flap.htm

www.snyderma.com/Breast.htm

We are having a great summer! Thank you for all your kind words, love and prayers!
Laura

Hysterectomy

So I had my hysterectomy on the 19th. I stayed at the hospital until Saturday A.M. and then came home. Everything went very well. I was sore for several days in my abdomen area but feeling fine now. I started the arimedex on Sunday but I cannot tolerate the headaches. I see Dr. Patt on Thursday and we will see what she says.



I have my reconstruction on the 24th of July. I am ready to get that done as well. I will be at Seton Main on 38th.

The guys have been taking swim lessons- today is the beginning of their second week. They are dong really awesome. Prepare to be amazed at the pool. I am so proud of them.

I sewed them Link costumes. Link is a character on a video game called Zelda. One green and one blue costume. I am very thankful that I do not have to sew Barbie clothes - they would probably go naked! Boys are easier in the sewing department.

Thanks for checking on me through my blog. Sorry it took so long to update it. Thank you for all your prayers and support.

Laura

Capitol Field Trip

We went to the Capitol today. The boys and I had a blast! Daddy took us all around and told us about the different areas. We enjoyed all the different statues and trees in the lawn surrounding.
We were naming the people in the different paintings around the rotunda and William asked how did they all have the first name Governor. Very funny boy! We got some coloring books so we can learn more and post cards to practice our writing with at the gift shop.

I signed the boys up for swim lessons and played phone tag with the gymnastics place. They are very excited.

Tomorrow we are going on a MOMS Club field trip to Krispy Kreme! We will get to make our own doughnuts! Yummy! I may be more excited than the boys are.

We are having a great summer so far! We look forward to learning a lot, relaxing, spending time with friends and family. And of course my hysterectomy and reconstructive surgery. Please continue to pray for my guys - they are doing good but when we talk about my surgery to prepare them for it they have lots of questions and concerns. I have faith that we will make it through this period in my treatment but it breaks my heart when they ask about will it hurt me, will I bleed to death, will I come home. I am also grateful that they do not hesitate to ask because it gives me an opportunity to explain things more thoroughly or differently so that they will understand.

Thank you for your love support and prayers.
Laura

Long overdue update

Thank you all for your continued prayers and support. I can not tell you how much I appreciate it - we all do. I apologize for the long delay between my blog updates.

June 19th I have a hysterectomy scheduled with Dr. Breen. It is laserscopic - I should be as good as new in 3 - 5 days.

I have decided on the reconstructive surgery that I want. I need to schedule it. As soon as I do I'll post it. I am going to have the DIEP flap and have both breast done. This is similar to the TRAM flap but no muscle is used- only skin and fat. I will still have ample size breast-hahaha! I'll be in ICU for 5 days and then it will take 3 or so weeks to feel up to par again - but I'll be done. (Except for the nipples and tattoos).

David Alexander's school year is wrapping up. He has graduation tomorrow and his last day is the 5th. William and I have been helping up there a lot. William loves to be in David's class. This summer we are going to home school with two units focusing on zoo animals and the Capital. We will take swim lessons and gymnastics.

Our garden is doing well. We got our first tomato today. We have had several squash, green beans and peas. The corn is starting to flower. We had a great crop of spinach. The hardest thing has been trying to keep everything wet.

We are doing real well - trying to relax and enjoy every minute. The boys are such great friends and play so well. We feel so blessed.

Five Year Hormone Inhibitor

I can not take either one of the five year hormone inhibitors without being miserable with vertigo, dizziness and headaches. I am scheduled to have my ovaries removed on the 19th of May. I continue to do research and pray about my reconstruction. I do not have enough skin to have the tissue expander placed in, but can do the other two.

Thank you for your continued support and prayers!
Laura

Dr Patt Visit Today

I visited Dr. Patt today. I have been taken off of Tamoxifen (half a dose is not adequate) - and I was still pretty miserable. I was given a Lupreon shot to stop my production of estrogen for three months. I'll do this until I have my ovaries removed. I also will start a new drug called Arimidex. It is for post menopausal women.

I had a follow up CT to make sure everything is as good as it was before chemo. I now have another bone scan. This is to see the bone mineral deposits, because now I have a greater risk for osteoporosis.

Monday the 28th I have a 3rd visit with a reconstructive surgeon. I also have an appointment with my ob to discuss removing my ovaries.

I continue to do research and pray. I have school schedules, insurance deductible time lines, and many other things to consider. It is overwhelming! But I can do it. It will all work out fine.

Thank you for your continued love and support!